I often think that I fall short and am not good enough.

The advise is that I should fake it till I make it. Compensate my perceived inadequacy with a lie.

In reality the problem is that I worry what people think of me. I cannot say what I really feel and do the things I really want because there is a fear of rejection. There is a pressure and expectations that hand over our life. Silly really.

So I tell lies to myself and make myself believe in the lie. To puff myself up.

Bluffing myself. I become the lie.

Contagious. More silly.

Fake for life. Sad.

Why can’t I just be myself without being a fake and be secure just being that?

Most of the time when people write about this it has to do with sexual orientation but in truth it is much more than this. So much more.


7 thoughts on “Bluffing myself

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